aBout not meant to be

Coach Rene told me last night that I am not competing this March 1 because I have no opponent in my weight category. I swear, that was such a happy news for me because I have been mulling for days already how to best tell him that I do not think it is such a good idea for me to compete at this time.

Foremost reason actually was that "wake-up call" (well, the kind that oozes with bluntness and sarcasm) from my brod Nathan who could not have made any clearer why it was pretty stupid of me to agree to fight without first knowing what I was up against. Add that to Coach Mark, Eduard and Mark's skepticism when I told them separately about my decision and I gradually began to doubt my "unwise" decision to just say yes to the invitation to fight.

There were several lessons learned from this experience:

1. Never say yes unless I have all the details.

2. Never assume. When someone says the fight is Kickboxing...never assume that he really means kickboxing...because maybe, he means Muay Thai.

3. Trust what I know. When I know that one month is such a short time to learn a skill and be good at it, then I should trust that nugget of wisdom learned from years of competing. It could be a different sport, but the same principles apply. There is no way I can pick up new skills and be good at them (especially when those skills involved using my knees and elbows to strike an opponent) with only a month to prepare (i.e. a month of thrice a week training).

4. Never go into a fight from a disavantaged position. Oo nga naman...I was about to just go jump on the ring stripped with one of my core skills. As Nathan said, it is no problem if I am competing for Sanshou, which I am not. Instead, I am going into a fight where I cannot, absolutely not, use whatever takedown skills Sanshou people basically have.

I have been hoping to tell Coach Rene that I want out from this fight. However, part of me (argh! that stubborn part of me) was against backing out. I already said yes and I was finding it really hard to renege on that commitment.

The other part of me naman, that sane and reasonable part, was wishing and praying that I would muster the will to tell the coach that I am not doing it. I guess, that wishing and praying hard part really worked. Sabi nga ni Paolo Coelho, “When you want something badly enough, the whole Universe conspires to give it to you." Amen.